Racket Magazine was all set up for an informative interview with the Washington band Daphne Loves Derby. It turns out that we are also exceptionally lazy. That’s when we had the genius idea to ask the bands LiveJournal community daphne_n_dizzle for questions. Here’s what happened from there:
Racket Magazine: Hey guys, just so you know, all of these questions come from the fans themselves. First question: What does Daphne see in Derby?
Jason: I don’t know. Let’s skip this question.
R: Alright. Jason, you already hold a degree at age eighteen, so you’re probably pretty smart… Do you know the atomic number of Cobalt?
J: Not Cobalt. What about you?
Kenny: Nope.
R: twenty seven.
J: You looked that up?
R: Yeah.
J: Well, pretend I said that.
R: Can you lick your own elbows?
J: (tries; fails) No.
R: What is the weirdest thing you’ve gotten from a fan?
J: Uhhh, an alien tattoo.
K: A pillow.
J: I’ve gotten, like, three different pillows.
R: What’s your opinion on stealing music?
K: It varies.
J: I’m not for it. Depends on what kind of band. You know, an independent band, it could really bite them, so no, I don’t like it.
R: Who is your favorite superhero?
K: Freakazoid for me.
J: Under Dog.
R: Boxers or briefs?
K: Boxer-briefs.
J: Boxers.
R: Xbox or PS2?
K: Neither.
J: N64.
R: Is anyone in the band a particularly good bowler?
J: No, we’re all pretty average.
R: Have you, or do you plan on, pulling pranks on anyone else on tour?
J: Thought about it…
K: We’ll make This Providence get into an accident.
R: What is your worst habit?
J: Saying "sorry" too much.
R: What do you think is the best sound in the world?
J: Laughter.
K: Michael Jackson.
R: Do you believe in ghosts?
K: Yes!!!
J: No.
R: Have you ever gone streaking?
J: (long pause) Noooo.
R: That was a long pause.
K: What about skinny dipping? Is that the same thing?
R: No, streaking is running naked, skinny dipping is swimming naked. So streaking is "no," and skinny dipping is a "yes."
J: Yeah.
K: Yup.
R: If you weren’t in a band, what would you be doing instead?
J: I’d probably be training Pokemon.
K: Hollywood Video.
R: Will you ever finish and release "Ergo Propter?"
K: Yes.
R: Can I have a free t-shirt?
K: Yes.
J: Yes.
(editor’s note: I never got a free shirt… liars.)
R: Have you seen Batman Begins yet?
K: I hate Batman! Nah, I like Batman, a la Michael Keaton.
J: No.
R: If you had a magical power, what would it be?
J: To control time.
K: Animorphing into Steven Seagal.
R: If the world were destoryed, what planet would you like to evacuate to?
K: Colob.
R: How old were you when you had your first kiss?
J: I don’t remember… Probably when I was real young.
K: Embryotic stage.
J: Yeah, embryotic stage.
R: Middle names?
J: Phone. Jason Phone Call.
R: If you were a piece of clothing, what would you be?
J: A hat.
K: An umbrella.
J: That’s not clothing.
K: Sunglasses.
R: Close enough. If you ruled the Earth, what would you do first?
J: Take a nap.
K: Free Taco Del Mar.
R: Where is your Heaven on Earth?
J: Splash Mountain.
K: Family and friends.
R: If you could play an instrument (other than the ones you can already play) what would you choose?
K: Harp.
J: Cello.
R: Will you play for my birthday?
J: Maybe, probably not.
R: Do you know how you got 2.3 million plus plays on PureVolume?
K: Just really lucky.
J: God.
R: Does anyone in the band have a strong religious affiliation and, if so, does it affect the music?
K: Well, all of us are religious, but when it comes to the music, we don’t call ourselves a Christian band, even though we are Christian.
J: Yeah, we don’t use it as our main carrier.
R: First thing you notice about the opposite sex?
K: Shoe size.
J: Smile.
R: If you could tour with anyone, who would it be?
K: Dashboard Confessional.
J: I would say that as well.
R: Have you ever fired a gun?
J: I have… A shotgun.
R: Have you ever had a crush on a cartoon?
K: Yes.
R: Who?
K: A lot… I liked Ariel from The Little Mermaid, I liked Belle from Beauty and the Beast, and Jasmine from Aladdin. Ariel, post-mermadic.
J: Nah, that’s freaky.
K: What? No!
R: Favorite Super Smash Bros character?
J: Pikachu.
K: Kirby.
R: Cool, thanks guys!
J: No problem.
K: That was awesome!
By Jonathan Yost