It’s winter. It’s cold. We get it. However, it doesn’t give anyone the excuse to confuse fab with frumpy. Some trends just need to be buried like an Egyptian. Do yourself a favor and ring in the New Year with a new sense of style and humor…because we at Racket dress to the nines all the time.
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1. Costello Glasses – To the wearers of these spectacles, if your name isn’t Buddy Holly or Elvis Costello, beware. You might look like you’re pretending to be smart to no avail. Chances are: a) those aren’t prescription lenses or b) you wear them without lenses. Like I said, to no avail. |
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2. Deep V-Neck T-shirts – I can’t decide if men think the plunge gives their chest hair room to breathe or is an attempt to show off pecks (or lack thereof). I don’t care if you are waxed, scarce, or Chuck Norris—lose the crazy v-neck, put on an undershirt, and then some. People don’t need to see your happy trail. |
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3. Uggs + Mini Skirts/Shorts – The origin of Ugg boots date back to the 1920s, but women and effeminate males continue to heinously wear these fleece wonders with bare skin showing. Stop it. Are you cold or aren’t you? |
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4. The Hipster Headband – Yet another trend that didn’t start in ’09 but is relentlessly still alive. The poof it creates on the head of a hipster is 1up worthy. To those of you who decide to wear less than one-inch thick piece of elasticity as a sweatband, be honest with yourself: Is it REALLY holding anything up? |
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5. Double Denim – Toto, I have a feeling we’re not in Kansas anymore. Nor are we in the 80s. You’ll look like the perfect blend of trash and a sack of potatoes attempting to be classy. |
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6. The Bunny Ears – Grown women should not be wearing these unless they mean to be the Velveteen Rabbit or a Playboy Bunny for Halloween. Only then is it acceptable. |
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7. Jewel-Encrusted Clothing – You’ll look cheap in it. I promise. It’s bling gone wrong. (Not that it was ever right.) Use jewelry to accentuate an outfit and not blind the person sitting next to you at the bus stop. |
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8. No Waist Mini-Dress – I don’t know the official name of this style, but it looks like a maternity shirt that skinny chicks wear as dresses. First of all, nobody needs to see your goods walking around town. You’re not Lady GaGa. And secondly, it makes you look pregnant no matter how thin you are. |
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9. Crocs – Some of my friends own these. They may be comfortable, but they look part-clog, part-crocodile teeth. To the creators of Crocs, you have proven that Americans will buy anything to air out their foot fungus and flat feet. Now design something less ugly, please. It’s for the children. |
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10. Ed Hardy – Christian Audigier is a GENIUS for having this expensive, gaudy crap selling strong. Even people that own this stuff think it’s hideous but dawn the gear out of buyer’s remorse. Ed Hardy belongs on your skin, not on cotton.–Kateri Lirio |