The craggy-voiced Shelton Hank Williams III sounds old and tired beyond his years. Endless touring and 2 1/2 –hour shows every night will probably do that to you. He’s also one of the few well-known country musicians making music worth listening to and that isn’t the same old rehash of Bible Belt morals and vapid love stories. Of course, it’s earned him a bit of a reputation in his hometown, country music capitol Nashville. Industry giant Curb Records signed him before attempting almost immediately to neuter him and make him safe for the CMT crowd. Every record he’s released has been an epic struggle to get things done his way. And, by and large, he’s been right. As Curb has backed off, his albums have been getting better and better, especially this year’s killer Straight to Hell. Even so, the label won’t put a record by his thrash-metal band Assjack, nor will they allow any other label to release it.
Hank is probably the most interesting (not to mention surreal) person I’ve ever interviewed in my capacity as a Racket writer. I also strongly suspect he was very stoned for the duration of our interview, but I didn’t bother to ask. What’d be the point?
Racket Matt: You sound tired, man. I take it it’s because of the road?
Hank Williams III: Yeah, definitely, dude. I’ve been coughin’…for 37 days straight, so…I’ve yet to throw in the towel. Tryin’ to keep it goin’, man.
RM: What’s your favorite beer?
HWIII: Uhh…besides “free,” I don’t really have one, since I don’t like drinking beer, honestly.
RM: Really?
HWIII: Yeah, I don’t, yanno, as far as singing, taking a sip of beer means I gotta burp ten times. So, whatever free beer is handed to me, I might take a sip out of, but I’ve never been a beer drinker. Always been a drugger more than a drinker.
RM: So what are you into these days?
HWIII: As far as what, like, drugs?
RM: Yeah.
HWIII: Ahh, just the basics. Pot and pills, maaan, the ritual for the show. I can’t party like I used to because of how the shows are, but uhhh, I save it all for the stage, maaan. Take what I need to make the show go to the next level, then deal with, uhh, the anxiety of coming down after. All the hard stuff, I keep it until I get home, where all the fun stuff is. I’m doing my job on the road; it’s not all fun. If we played for only 50 minutes, maybe then I could party like a rock star, but that’s not the case.
RM: Is there gonna be an Assjack record coming out?
HWIII: Yes.
RM: On Curb?
HWIII: Curb’s gonna have, like, 5% to do with it. It’s gonna be through somebody else.
RM: How many fishsticks can you eat in one sitting?
HMIII: If I’m hungry, I could do…40, if I’m halfway hungry. I can eat quite a bit.
RM: So what constitutes your breakfast of champions? I usually just drink High Life and masturbate.
HWIII: Uhhh, breakfast of champions is no breakfast at all. Just…drinking your coffee and downing whatever you gotta down to get yourself awake and get into it.
RM: So why do you think bass players get all the chicks?
HWIII: *laughs* Bass players. Hmmm. I dunno about that one. Depends on what band you’re talkin’ about, but in most cases that’s not the case.
RM: Not in your band?
HWIII: Uhhh, maybe because they have such an easy job.
RM: *dies laughing*
RM: What do you think country and punk have in common?
HWIII: Maybe a loner aspect, depressive side, maybe a little bit of an outcast kinda thing…but, yanno, for the true punk rocker there’s not that much in common, unless that punk rock kid gets older and then starts getting into rockabilly when he’s chilling out. There might be kinda similarities here and there, but it’s definitely two different things. Some people get it. There is a certain breed out that wear Pantera shirts and listen to David Allan Coe and all that shit, maaan. But, punk rock people, you know how snobby they can be.
RM: No doubt.
HWIII: There’s maybe a couple of things that are close, but in the end it’s still different.
RM: Did you get laid on prom night?
HWIII: I never went to prom.
RM: Why not, man? Aside from your birthday and Valentine’s Day, prom night is the only sure thing!
HWIII: Never went to prom, never walked the line, got voted Most Individualistic. I was always the freak in the black t-shirt hanging out with the dudes that were already kicked out of school trying to be in a band. Never partied much, really. I mean, ‘cause I was like on federal probation. So it’s not like I was gonna worry about “oh man, gonna go to this party and wait for the cops to come,” and all that shit. Y’know, I had to watch my ass, I was in some pretty deep shit. Just wanted to hang out with people I could just jam with, and party over at their house. Y’know, take acid, and play music, and fuckin’, that was what I did from 16 to 21, but I mean, still to this day…I spent most of my time in the basement at the Luntsford’s.
RM: Ok, this is probably the weirdest question I’ve ever asked. You know how the Auschwitz death camp is now a museum? Well, what the hell do you think they sell in the gift shop?
HWIII: I would say they would sell Jewish propaganda.
RM: Why would you say that?
HWIII: Well, I mean, right? Jews were the ones that got burned, so the way to make Auschwitz “okay” I would think is to sell Jewish kinda things.
RM: You mean, like, “My family got gassed, and all I got was this lousy t-shirt” kinda thing?
HWIII: Ahhh nah, more like Jewish stars and the little candles, whatever those things are called, stuff that deal with the Jewish religion. Almost like you’re walking into a Christian store…I mean, they’re definitely not selling swastikas and shit like that. So that’s the only thing I could think of that they could sell. You have any idea what they sell?
RM: No clue. I don’t even know if they have a gift shop.
HWIII: Ahhh, okay, so it’s a fake question. I see. Alright. Well, I was giving you a serious answer. If there was one, that’s the only thing I think they could sell that would be respectful.
RM: While we’re on religion, you’ve said many times that your mom was a born again fundamentalist. What effect did this have on you and your attitude?
HWIII: Well, it pushed me more to the dark, naturally. If you’re gonna burn my records and all that shit, take me to Satan seminars and tell my friends they can’t walk in the house ‘cause they’re wearing black t-shirts and all this crazy stuff, naturally it’s gonna push me in that direction. She still ain’t proud to this day. I mean, it goes back. I wrote a paper in the fifth grade called “The Day the Devil Took Over Christmas.” I’ve always had this fascination that’s always been there. She helped fuel the fire, and we still do not see eye-to-eye these days. That’s the way it is. She wasn’t a cool mother. It happens, being in the Bible Belt.
RM: Why do you think the entertainment industry routinely underestimates the intelligence and taste of people that live in the Midwest?
HWIII: *coughs* ‘Cause there’s more space, it’s slower, definitely some not-as-smart people as far as people that are on-the-go, on-the-go, on-the go. In the South, got your privacy, and your “fuck all y’all” kinda attitude, and that’s kinda stuck around. But here in another 50 years, people will see how intense the South will be when there’s nowhere left to fuckin’ piss or puke in New York, in LA, and everyone’s being run over by gangs and drugs and guns and all the violence and all the diseases starting to pop up and kill us all. So, enjoy some property if you got it. Cash in on it while you can, while it’s still cheap, ‘cause in the next ten years, maaan, I see it coming. I mean, now there’s 2 o’clock traffic in Nashville. *cough*
RM: What effect, if any, have big box stores like Wal-Mart have had on country music?
HWIII: I guess just givin’ people that live way out in the sticks the option to buy something that’s clean and pretty and plastic and fake and supposedly “American.” I always say whoever has to buy music at Wal-Mart I feel sorry for. I’ve never seen Wal-Mart as a music distributor. All it’s done for country music is make it more fake than it already is…you can step over five feet and buy something that says “fuck,” “shit,” “goddamn,” and fucks with racism, homosexuality, politics, and religion and all this other shit in the Hollywood section. Music and DVDs, it’s a fine line, and goddammit, at least somebody’s gettin’ away with it. Much respect to Trey Parker and Matt Stone for fucking Wal-Mart in the ass.
RM: I didn’t see the point in them taking that “Dick in Dixie” song off your new CD. Are people not going to hear it and have their souls saved as a result? It’s just a fuckin’ song.
HWIII: It’s only words, and they took off an already edited version. And like I said, they sell South Park to children at Wal-Mart, and they’re gonna worry about a few stupid words on our record? It’s just bullshit, man. While we got kids dyin’ for our freedom, they’re gonna worry about people smoking cigarettes in a bar. That’s just as bullshit as anything else, man, and it’s time for people to wake the fuck up and get real. Words are words, big fuckin’ deal. Deal with some of the real problems at hand in the United States, and it’s not tobacco or cuss words or marijuana or any of these little fucking things. Step up, get real, and quit bein’ so goddamn anal.
RM: Why do you think the record buying public, in general, embraces gangsta rap but shuns outlaw country music?
HWIII: Because you got a buncha uptight, “white is right” stupid fucking assholes in charge of the country music world. Look at rappers. Most people that work in the rap business are pretty hip, know what the fuck’s going, and a lot more American than these other motherfuckers that claim to be “preserving the correct, politically okay race,” or whatever. The rappers know what the fuck’s up, and these country motherfuckers are a buncha old fuckin’ Bible Belt, Christianity-oriented motherfuckers that are just ain’t worth a shit and fuckin’ stuck in their ways. The new rappers are fuckin’ bringin’ in the new anarchy and takin’ it to the next level and basically sayin’ “fuck alla y’all, check this out, we are the fuckin’ new dominating fuckin’ force on the street and in music, and fuck you. We don’t need your money, we don’t need your rules.” Much respect to all of ‘em. Everyone that has cost a lot and put out a record with a million “fucks” and “shits” and “goddammit, I’m gonna blow your fuckin’ head off,” more power to ‘em. At least that is more American than some asshole at Wal-Mart gettin’ rid of a song called “Dick in Dixie, Cunt in Country.” Whatever.
RM: Why do you think in modern country music there’s such a veneration of small-town life and simplistic morals?
HWIII: It goes back to the farms. I was raised on a farm. Did my time on it and all that shit, dude, and there is that part of working America that used to be more involved than it is now. There is that small town feel, driving on a dirt road, you come on my property and I’ll fuckin’ fuck you up and all that shit, man. It does come with the territory. Those people that have that are very fuckin’ thankful, y’know, ‘cause it’s slowly disappearing. But that does play true, and a lot of the country people out there, some of ‘em really were raised on a farm or do understand how most farmers nowadays have to sell marijuana to keep the kids in school and food on the table and their cows fed, and that’s the fuckin’ way it is. It’s a good feeling, y’know? It’s what keeps me sane, walkin’ the hills and cuttin’ fuckin’ wood. When I’m outta these bars, it keeps me grounded, for some reason.
RM: Ok Hank, I got one last question for you.
HWIII: It’s all good, man.
RM: Would you describe LA as “a giant vortex of shit?”
HWIII: *laughs* It’s definitely a giant vortex of something, I don’t know if it’s necessarily shit. There’s definitely some soul-suckin’ goin’ on there. I got to live there a little bit when my mom lived there, got to taste it. It’s very plastic, very “who’s got the best bitch and the best car and all the money” and all that “game” bullshit. I never liked it, I never will. But there is some damn good music, here and there, comin’ outta there. It’s the home of the Satantic Hispanics, and *in evil, Lord of Darkness voice* they are getting ready to dom-in-ate. Anyway, s’all I know. It’s good for some people, but for somebody like me, I would end up killin’ somebody if I lived there.
RM: I know the feeling. LA is the worst part about America.
HWIII: Thank you for the different questions, man.